Overcoming Anger video

» Click to view the video.

Have you ever been angry? Have you ever felt that a “Hulk” inside you wants to come out and hit something or hurt someone? Even as Christians, we are not immune to that “intense emotional state induced by displeasure” or anger, as defined by the Webster's Dictionary.

What is Anger? Ephesians 4:26a shows us that it is possible to “be angry, yet do not sin.”

It is evident from this passage that there are two kinds of anger. The first is righteous anger which does not lead to sin. Righteous anger is being angry and unhappy when sin is present. In the Old Testament, God was often angry at the Israelites because they kept committing sin. We should feel the same righteous anger about our sins. In 1 Samuel 17:43-47, David was angry at Goliath for defying and mocking God. In the same way, we should feel a holy discontent when we see sin around us. Righteous anger is anger that leads us to hate sin and do something about it.

The second kind of anger is the anger of man which, on the contrary, leads us to sin. James 1:20 says, “The anger of man does not achieve the righteousness of God.” This kind of anger leads us to hurt other people, often the people we love. To prevent ourselves from hurting others in our anger, Ephesians 4:26b tells us, “Do not let the sun go down on your anger.”

When we are angry at someone, we should tell them: “You know I love you,” “You are not the enemy,” “Let's settle this” and “Let's agree to disagree”. With these words, we can control our temper and avoid the destruction of relationships that surely results from our anger.

Why is Anger So Bad? Ephesians 4:27 says, “Do not give the devil an opportunity.” In Greek, “opportunity” is topos or "place". When we are angry, we give the devil a place in our hearts. We give the devil an opportunity to take advantage of our anger and to cause us to sin.

Our anger can drive us to want other people to know that they caused us pain or that they violated our rights. Our anger can cause us to lose our temper and to inflict emotional, even physical pain which leaves scars, not only on other people but also on ourselves. In the NIV Bible, Ephesians 4:27 reads, “Do not give the devil a foothold.” In war games, a “foothold” is a position usable as a base for further advance, and eventually for takeover by the enemy. In the Christian life, anger is the devil's foothold. When we carry anger, our rage can eventually drive Christ out of our hearts, destroy our lives and the people we love. How do we prevent this from happening? Ephesians 4:31-32 provides clear instructions: “Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice, and be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other just as God in Christ has also has forgiven you.”

How Do We Overcome Anger? As Christians, we are to be radically different – we are to overcome anger. It is impossible to do this on our own, without God's grace. The book of Ephesians shows us three God-given ways to do it:

1. Guard Your Tongue. When we are angry, we must not speak. Ephesians 4:29 commands, “Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for edification…” We must stop saying unpleasant words and start speaking only words that build up people. We must process every situation that induces our anger. We should not judge other people's motives nor jump into conclusions but choose to believe the best about everyone. We need to guard our hearts from anger because whatever is in our hearts comes out through our words. For every word we speak, we will be accountable on Judgment Day (Matthew 12:34).
2. Grieve Not the Holy Spirit. When we received Jesus, God gave us the Holy Spirit to empower us to do what is right. As true Christians, we cannot stay angry and stay in sin because the Holy Spirit is in our hearts (Romans 8:9). Ephesians 4:30 tells us, “Do not grieve the Holy Spirit…” Grief is a love language; only the people we love can grieve us. When we get angry and allow sin in our lives, we grieve the Holy Spirit. To overcome anger, we must listen to the Holy Spirit and surrender every bitterness, wrath, clamor, slander and malice (Ephesians 4:31) to our big God who causes everything to work together for good.
3. Give Grace Forgive. To overcome anger, Ephesians 4:32 tells us to “be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.” Forgiveness comes from the Greek word charis which means grace. When we forgive, we give grace to somebody who does not deserve it. Forgiving is telling another “You don't owe me any debt anymore.” How and why do we forgive? Let us look at our sins and realize that God has forgiven us all. If God forgave us, how can we not forgive others? Jesus taught us to forgive other people “seventy times seven” (Matthew 18:22). The mark of a true Christian is forgiveness. We must forgive as God has forgiven us.

By following these steps, we can be victorious over our rage. Let us be radical Christians! Let us overcome anger!