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Cheyenne: Beyond expectations
Posted October 9, 2008
I heard Jesus’ name even before I could utter words. I studied in a Christian school all my life, went to church every Sunday, and enjoyed reading Bible stories. I even cried while watching Jesus nailed on the cross in the movie, “Jesus of Nazareth.”
Yes! I’ve known the story of Jesus from his birth to resurrection, without recognizing the essence of it. Before, I thought that Jesus was just part of history, part of religious stories, just like any other fairy tale.
God blessed me with a loving family. He also blessed me with so many good things in life. When I was in high school, He gave my parents a business, which helped them meet our basic needs and even wants. This business grew big. However, bit by bit, it was stealing away our time for God. We failed to thank Him.
There was a time, it was a Sunday, when some merciless people went forcefully to our house, aimed a gun at my dad, and asked for weapons that we didn’t even have. They told us that they had no bad intentions; they just wanted weapons.
They locked my dad in a room and searched the whole house. They didn’t allow us to accompany them. We all stayed in the dining room. We didn’t have any communication with the outside, because they cut off the phone lines.
When our neighbors sensed that something wrong was happening, they gathered outside our house and called a policeman who also lived nearby. They shouted if we were okay, and my mom lied with a simple, “Yes,” fearing that if she yelled for help, the situation might worsen.
When the so-called search was over, the wicked people asked my dad to drive them somewhere. When we checked our room, we realized that all our valuables were missing. That was when my mom panicked and cried for the security of my dad. And God, who is forever faithful, allowed my dad to return home safely. Praise God! He also didn’t allow those people to steal our collection from customers, which was quite a huge amount.
How did that happen? It was a miracle. My sister told us that the key didn’t work when they were trying to open the door where we kept the money. Praise God again!
But despite God’s protection and blessings, we still failed to give time to Him. We didn’t lack money, but we did lack peace of mind. Food was abundant, but security was scarce.
I believe that it was because of our ungratefulness that God took our business. He’s so good that He took it away when I was about to graduate, just when my parents didn’t have to work so hard for us, because my sister already had a job then.
God didn’t leave us with nothing, but I was devastated. I had taken up a business course for the sake of what He had just taken away.
That was when I felt fear. I was afraid of what might happen to my future. I thought at the time, that’s the only thing we have and God took it away. I was an introverted person, too. I lacked self-confidence, and it gave me a problem as I applied for a job.
In a quiet moment, God let me feel His presence; He let me feel security. I prayed and asked God, “Lord, please give me job that I don’t have to apply for. Just let the jobs knock. A simple office job will do.” I prayed for this every single day.
Barely a week after, God answered my prayer. A friend called and told me that company he was working for was looking for a contract office clerk, someone who could work on computers. He said if I would accept it, I would start as soon as possible. But he also warned me that the job was only good for three to six months.
When you ask something from God, He always gives you beyond your needs, beyond your expectations. He gave me the opportunity to work in a multinational company and I grabbed it. Through God’s mysterious ways, the six months got extended, and my job eventually became regular. I can’t imagine how everything happened; it just went so well.
Because of the greatness that God has shown to me, I became so eager to know him better. I was thirsting for His words then, so I read the Bible more often. But no matter how frequently I read the Scriptures, I still felt that there was something lacking. I asked myself, why?
The answer was simple. I didn’t understand what the Bible was talking about. I was still uncertain about whether I was saved. So I prayed to God to open a venue that would make me understand his words well.
Then I learned that there would be changes in the management at the office. Again, I felt fear, especially when I learned that the person who would be my new boss was the person whom everybody at the office feared. We were all so scared; everybody warned us and told us scary stories about this person. My imagination was on overdrive.
When he took over the office, I was surprised! He was not at all as bad as everybody thought. But terror didn’t leave me. Every telephone ring was still torture for me, because every time I heard it, I’d ask myself, “Did I do something wrong?” – even when I didn’t know who was calling.
Then, one time, I heard music coming from my boss’s office. I listened to every lyric and realized that it was all about praising God. I was so amazed and at the same time felt so relieved – and guilty for judging harshly. I didn’t know that he was already Christian! I was amazed by how Christ can work in someone’s life.
The turning point of my life came when my boss, whom I now consider my friend, invited me to attend Bible study at CCF. This was an answered prayer from God, because I’d longed to attend one. Eventually, every word in the Bible became so clear that I could hear God talking to me.
This is how I’ve come to know who really Jesus is. He is not just a part of history, but also and more importantly a living God who saved me. I’ve sinned against Him, taken away time that should be given to Him. I was ungrateful, and in return, He embraced me and gave me eternal life which I don’t even deserve.
Realizing all these things has changed my life. God’s unearned love for a sinner like me is so unfathomable. Looking back at the things God has done for me only prove that He is control of everything. He deserves every praise! God’s faithfulness to his words and my faith in Him paved my way to eternal life. No more worries for future!
God never ever failed me. The gift of salvation inspired me so much, that’s why I’m here today. I love God so much that I want to obey Him and follow His Word. I could never fail the one who gave me eternal life.
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Tess: A new meaning for hope
Posted
I have been attending CCF since May 2006. I am the eldest of five children; I have three sisters and one brother.
Before I started attending Bible studies and church services here in CCF, I felt empty. I always felt that, despite the many disappointments in my life, I could always overcome them by my own efforts. I always believed that I am my own best friend. To help you understand this, let me tell you bits and pieces of my long history.
As a young couple then, my parents both worked for our daily living. My dad had just started as subcontractor and engineer for a construction company, and my mother was a bank teller. They were almost never home.
The only companions I knew were our helpers. When I was around five years old, they would bring me outside while they chatted with the neighbors’ helpers. They got to befriend the mailman who consistently came by our street. I had considered this mailman my friend. But there was one event that changed everything.
While hanging out, our helper forgot to prepare the rice for dinner, so she left me to be watched by the mailman. While she was inside the house, hustling to do her chores, I was molested. Because I was so young the time, I didn’t know what it meant and certainly didn’t know how grave the situation was. When I got a little older, I realized what had happened and decided not to tell anyone, not even my parents.
As a child, I always felt that it was just too much to bear. My father is a good man but at times emotionally distant, and my doting mother is a bit too overbearing. (They are not really spiritually empowered in their faith.) I have always felt a constant need for attention. There were always times I wanted to be needed and loved.
I remember that if I accidentally broke a plate, my mom and dad would get so mad, they would lock me inside my bedroom the whole day and wouldn’t give me lunch. Another time, our helper hit me with a dustpan because she got irritated with me, and this resulted in a bruise on my arm. When I told my parents about it, they scolded me in front of the helpers instead of confronting the girl about what she had done.
Incidents like these were part of a cycle for many years. It had been difficult for me to take. I decided not to say anything more. I decided not to care.
When I went to college, in my toughest year yet, I was in the limelight as the target of all these rumors and gossip — lies. I’ve been betrayed by the people whom I thought were my friends and became the butt of every joke. The worst rumors and lies you can possibly think of were told about me. It damaged me; I was at rock bottom.
My experiences with relationships were bad, too. There was something in me – HOPE – with which I tried to open my heart many times. But things just exploded in my face.
I decided that I would never give in to my disappointments. I would be strong.
But I realized that I wasn’t. I never felt emptier, that my heart had nothing left to be filled with. EMPTINESS already consumed my heart. The load was only getting heavier, and I was getting bitterer. I blamed others, and above all, I blamed myself. No one could ever love and accept me.
I learned from a very good friend of mine, a Christian, about experiencing God’s love and forgiveness. He gave me a new meaning of HOPE – finally.
What a blessing it was when a friend of mine invited me to join a D-Group. I learned a lot about myself, about surrendering my hurts, and about trusting God.
Even when all things have failed, when all relationships have not survived, and when all human efforts have thawed out, GOD IS THERE, and HE LOVES ME.
God purchased us at a high price. John 3:16 says, “For God so loved the world that He gave His only son, so that everyone who believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life.”
As I grew, I realized that my past was not a burden for me any more than it was God’s. How He must have felt when I closed my heart for any opportune experience! I cried and decided to fast for all my hurts, and I prayed for revelation. My revelation came to me as swiftly – I should forgive myself.
I surrendered my wounds to God and asked Him for healing and repentance. I allowed God to overflow in my heart and prayed for a life of true forgiveness. As God had been my ultimate lover from the very beginning, I allowed Him to renew my life and strengthen my heart.
My hope and trust is in God. He will love me till the end of time. It might seem impossible, but all I know is described in Deuteronomy 31:16 – “Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you.” Nothing can compare to my heavenly Father’s love for me.
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Tanya: What if God tells me to end the relationship?
Posted
Before I knew Christ, I was involved in a relationship that I knew wasn’t pleasing to God. But because I thought I was so in love and couldn’t live without my ex-boyfriend, I couldn’t let the relationship go.
The time came that I was so distraught, I cried almost every night, because I didn’t know what to do.
At that time, I started to attend Bible studies in CCF and felt convicted every time about this relationship. I knew somehow that God wanted me to give up the relationship, but I was so scared and didn’t want to be the one to break it off.
I sought the advice of my missionary friend, and she told me to seek God’s will through prayer and fasting.
At first I was scared to seek God’s will through prayer. What if God tells me to give up the relationship? Will I have the strength live without it? And if indeed it was God’s will to end the relationship, could I possibly muster the courage to tell my boyfriend? I was so scared. If God made His will clear to me, would I be willing to obey Him?
Nevertheless, with fear and trembling, I fasted and prayed for God’s will in that relationship. I prayed that if God didn’t really want this relationship, my boyfriend would be the one to break it off, because I didn’t have the guts to do it. I was really desperate to know the will of God even if it would cause me pain to obey and follow him.
The day after praying and fasting, God answered my prayer. My boyfriend broke up with me, and I knew at that moment that that was what God wanted.
I still cried over and mourned the relationship, but after that, I really felt incredible peace and joy which I have never felt before.
I claimed God’s promise in Jeremiah 29:1 – “‘For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.’”
God’s thoughts and ways are really higher than ours. I realized that prayer unleashed God’s power. Indeed, God answers prayers, and I trust that His will is truly the best! To God be the glory forever!
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Dana: What defined me couldn’t take away the pain
Posted
Before I met Jesus Christ, my life was half-empty. I had an otherwise comfortable life, because everything was handed to me, and my parents made all the difficult choices. To the people around me, I seemed to be the most happy-go-lucky person, and I really thought I was okay myself.
But in reality, I did not know who I was, and I was mostly struggling to fit in. I thought what defined me were my clothes, my shoes, my so-called achievements, etc. My happiness depended on people’s opinion of me.
All that changed when trouble in our family came. Though in the beginning I was in denial, I slowly realized that the pain was real, and I began to see that the things that I thought defined me could not take away the pain. They left me feeling all the more hollow.
God, in His great love, picked me up from my sorry state and led me to Him. He led me to a Bible study group where I learned and still continue to learn about His character. He made me realize that He alone could give me the comfort that I needed.
But God didn’t stop at removing my pain. He continued to reveal Himself to me. He reminded me about the thousand times He was there in the past and how He had waited for me to really value him, and to give Him first place in my heart.
In the past, I viewed God as a distant god and a great punisher, but He opened my eyes to the truth. I understood for the very first time in my life that GOD truly loves me. I learned of how much he loves me, through the beautiful things that He was showing me. Most beautiful of all was that I understood finally how He gave his one and only son to give me life.
Knowing God’s faithfulness has brought me to where I am right now. Now, I do not live in fear of losing what I have here on earth, because I know that God promised us an eternal life with Him.
Jesus also put order in my life and set everything in place. Before, I was easily agitated about many things; now God is quick to remind me to relax, because He is always in control. Before, I was plainly existing and drifting without purpose; now I am living life to the fullest, because God gave me a clear direction to take.
Most important of all, I live in God’s love, and it’s just the greatest thing that’s ever happened to me. Nothing can ever compare to the joy I have in my heart because of God’s love.
Would you like to know God, too?
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